You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize