And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
