well I can't set my house on fire every night
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Randomize
