ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
