Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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