I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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