He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
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