Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
