One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
high people should be assigned attendants
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
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