I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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