i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize