He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
