where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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