i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
you never un-have a 4some
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
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