Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
