When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
