I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Pappa wants mamma naked
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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