Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
