then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
