I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
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