I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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