At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
