It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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