So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
