yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize