Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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