He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
