was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize