Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
