Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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