Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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