Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
