Buhtt sex?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
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