Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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