I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
they're like a gay fantastic four
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
