We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
accomplished twins. life is a go
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
