I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
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