Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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