A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Boobs speak an international language.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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