i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just found a bag of teeth...
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What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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