you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Randomize
