so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Four minutes until I can fart!
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
