she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
