was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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