And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Randomize
