Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
