He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
