i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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