Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
