I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Randomize
